Don't Chase The Train

'The price of discipline is less than the pain of regret.'

Life often seems complicated & difficult. Events sneak up on us & catch us off guard. Many times, it seems the train has left the station & we're working our best to catch up.

The overwhelm of 'the everyday', others' expectations, existing responsibilities & our own hopes & dreams weigh upon us. We spend more time firefighting than truly living life.

We do too much. We stay too busy. We think in terms of others' perspectives. We don't think much. I mean, we think, just not much about how things should be, how we should be in a way that translates to making necessary changes. We think more about the catching up we need to do & not nearly as much about how to get in front of the train to change the trajectory of the tracks.

So we wind up being a response to the world around us when the world around us should be a response to us. Pro-Act is to act in advance. The only way to act in advance, is to think in advance. Think way ahead of time. It's not really thinking that far in advance, but our culture & those around us will make it seem unusual. That's because most of the time, they are living behind.

Behind is normal. Not ready is the usual way. Lack of preparation seems easier on the front end & leads to much more difficulty afterward.

I have this conviction, that if we think about what we want, we think about the right questions to ask, then with counsel, understanding, seeking, learning & thinking, we will determine very good answers. If we think, we can live in front of life. I believe this is wisdom.

So, we must think. Take time to ask the questions in front of the train. How & who do we want to be? What situations should we prepare our children for? What routines do we need to change & alter? What are the values & purposes we need to inject more into the moments of our life?

Those are some questions, there are many many more to be asked. Thinking ahead will make your doing more valuable.

Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action.
Peter F. Drucker

Who Cares

When you care, you want to help. But, you are responsible to ... not responsible for ... someone. Handle the responsibility toward them with great care, do what you can, but don't try to control the outcome. The outcome is not yours, the journey is. Do your part well and have peace.

Impossible

Everything is "Impossible" before it is achieved. ~ Nelson Mandela

If you do the same thing as everyone else, how will you get different results? Of course, if you do things another way, then you will encounter risk, danger of "failure", ridicule, and by sticking your neck out, you could get embarrassed. The world has its systems, its ways and most stay in its flow, because its comfortable there. It's just easier that way.

It is like we are in a river and the flow is down stream, without much resistance, we will be going the way the world has designed us to go. Stay in front of the t.v. Be short sighted. Live based out of other's perceptions. Keep up with the Joneses. By the bigger house. Grab the most possible. Leave marriage behind because, "love" isn't there anymore. Just get by at work. Increase the noise and the pace of life because activity must provide value. Doubt that anyone could know more than you.

Or:

Find convictions and live them out regardless of the noise. Live life for more than self gratification. Be courageous and adventurous in the face of "normal". Love by more than words. Impact the world through intentionality in the unique calling. Do things different than the flow. Give more. Slow life down for priorities. Be still and know that he is God. Live simply. Invest in your children preparing them for all of life. Believe God.

So then...the paths lay out before us. One is the way of the world and the other is available to us as well. The latter may seem Impossible sometimes. It just seems too hard. We take one step forward and it seems we experience a reversal. The way of the world doesn't want us to escape. It wants to keep us comfortable and reactive. We can feel the flow pressing upon us, but that is not our direction. We have the vision and intention to break the resistance. Our way is forward.

In our home, our children will tell you, "can't" is a bad word, actually...it doesn't exist. It looks more like this, " ". Confucius wrote, "He who says he can and he who says he cant are both usually right."

People say it is Impossible. Everything is, before it is achieved.

Too Often We Are Scared

I collect items that speak to me, messages or pieces that motivate me in a worthy direction. There was a Barry Sanders Nike, "Just Do It" ad from the late 80's that did just that. Here it is...

Too often we are scared.
Scared of what we might not be able to do.
Scared of what people might think if we tried.
We let our fears stand in the way of our hopes.
We say no when we want to say yes.
We sit quietly when we want to scream.
and we shout with the others,
When we should keep our mouths shut.
Why?
After all,
we do only go around once.
There's really no time to be afraid.
So stop.
Try something you've never tried.
Risk it.
Enter a triathlon.
Write a letter to the editor.
Demand a raise.
Call winners at the toughest court.
Throw away your television.
Bicycle across the United States.
Try bobsledding.
Try anything.
Speak out against the designated hitter.
Travel to a country where you don't speak the language.
Patent something.
Call her.
You have nothing to lose
and everything
everything
everything to gain.

He quit at the peak of his game. He did it against the grain. He did it his way.

Humble Confidence

False humility is a nice thought but it misses the ultimate point. You know it when you hear it. I appreciate the comments of that approach actually, because it's better than arrogance which is usually what the individual is protecting against. But still, it never sounds quite right because you KNOW the person doesn't believe what they are saying about themselves. They just know they'd rather sound humble vs cocky. I appreciate that about them.

But in truth, we're not told to bring our false sense of self to the table. This isn't humility. On the contrary, the highest since of humility is to take everything that you are, all of your strengths, every bit of your sense of self and stand as tall as you possibly can. When you do so, then you measure yourself against the standard of Christ and the standard of a Holy, Perfect, All powerful God, you understand that at your very best, you fall woefully short of the goal. See Al Roker above. You cannot live up even at your finest hour, no matter how perfect your posture.

When we attempt this, we gain understanding and appreciation for the price that was paid for our souls.

And yet, we are called to go confidently into our calling, into our roles in life. How can this be resolved?

Our confidence, does not come from our abilities, but from the truth that all power, strength, understanding, wisdom and direction is with us every step of the way...IF we choose to step into it. It is a gift and the God of the universe says we should be confident because he is with us and his will will prevail in us. So go. Go well. Go with confidence, not in yourselves but in whose you are and who you've been created to be. Live out your calling and be in step with the Spirit.

Accept the fact that at your best, you will never be anywhere close to what you should be. Press forward anyhow because he who calls you is faithful and become who you were born to be.

Destination

We are in the river of life. The river is moving and if you're just floating along, it WILL take you where it wants to go. You'll be floating by the banks with the natural flow of the water. This is perfect if you know where it's taking you and if you are wanting to wind up in that location.

But, what if you're not sure where it takes you and what if you want something else?

Set out in the direction that you intend to go. Andy Stanley says " Too often people get themselves into undesirable situations and wonder, "How did I get here?"

He goes on to say:
"Stanley: As a pastor I’ve spent 30 years talking to people and heard every kind of story imaginable. Often times when people tell their story they conclude by saying, “I don’t know how I got to where I am.” Sometimes it’s financially, sometimes it’s relationally, sometimes it’s with their marriage, their kids, their parents, academically, professionally, whatever. So they ask, “How in the world that I end up here?”

And as I listen to their story about half way through I think, “Well it is pretty obvious how you got here. This is the path you chose.” But for many of us there is a disconnect between where we intend to be and the path we choose, and the path that we choose in life - whether it is financially, relationally, morally - always trumps our intention. So people pray in one direction but they walk in a different direction, and direction always determines where we end up."

This makes sense to us if we were sailing across the Atlantic, but somehow when it comes to life, we'll ignore the fact that our choices have in large part led to our current location. If you're out on the ocean, you can look back across your journey and see how you're previous direction created your current path.

Where do you want to be?

Look out in into next year. What do you hope happens in your life? What do you want to experience or accomplish?

In five years, 2015 will be coming to a close. How old will you be? How old will those around you be (kids, friends etc)? Put yourself in that time and realize this, assuming you're still on this earth, the next five years will happen either way. You might as well be intentional about it. "Be very careful then how you live, not as unwise, but as wise, making the most of every opportunity"

I know most guys, struggle consistently with career. As you look out, where do you want your career to be, what do you want to be doing? To go that path, what is required, what is needed and are you taking the steps that lead in that direction?

As you set out on a new direction, watch out for yourself. We don't believe. We doubt. We fear. We are insecure. We initially enjoy comfort over adventure. "But, what if I fail?" "What if it doesn't work?" "What if they say NO to me?" "Our greatest foes in which we must combat are chiefly within."

Think on what God is saying to you here. What has he called you to? Are your thoughts in line with the call and purpose of the scriptures? Go after wisdom and understanding in your direction. Seek wise informed counsel, what is their feedback to you? Be confident in what God has placed in your heart. You must believe his direction is with you, the spirit's power is on you and he will direct your path. It's the journey we are on, we set out with Him in mind and He will call and move on our behalf.

So, take that class. Wake up early. Make that call. Get the training. Learn to cook, learn to dance, spend that time with your kids...Get after it. You'll be five years down the road with or without "that" ability or experience, you might as well be purposeful about it.

Set your compass, make your direction and start moving now, against the flow...this will be your way.

Don't Be Him

Don't be him.

Don't be her.

Your best when you're you.

You've heard this and you have this thought in your mind. But, like most people, you don't know this deep in your soul. Our society values certain gifts over others and this creates envy, jealousy, doubt and insecurity. Those on the stage are held high, honored, revered, celebrated and adored. Those on the floor, those in the arena preparing, those organizing are less valued by most. They are not discounted intentionally, but they are discounted nonetheless.

I had a conversation with an older doctor, close to retirement, who was thinking about what to do next for impact utilizing his gifts and passions. In his search for what's next for himself, he couldn't get past wanting a life and idolizing a famous pastor. This gentleman was given constant praise by his coworkers, by his staff and by his clients. The job that he did touched and saved many lives over decades of work. In his mind, his work was less important somehow. To himself, his impact, though different, was not as critical.

The sad part of this was his lack of contentment in his work, the way God made him. He looked out because he wanted to be "Him". This is a human problem, not just for men. Ladies have their struggles, wanting to be "Her" and thereby being insecure with who they are.

Lance Armstrong describes his experiences growing up in Texas where football and baseball (the traditional sports) were king. For him to go his own way, to follow his own path, he had to withstand certain amounts of ridicule or at least, underappreciation for his efforts vs his counterparts in other sports.

Scriptures say, like the body has its members, so the body of Christ has its members and we need each one to do their work, to the best of their ability in order to work in unity with one another. Don't allow the success and strengths of others to make you doubt yourself and your path. Your path and road will be different and unique. Follow yours. Seek yours and "become" who you were born to be.